I heard from God today.
He wrote me an email.
Clarity and mystery all in the save breath or in this case...gmail message.
He was sorry to inform me that HR and budget cutbacks had vetoed my almost job. The message was kind but clear. My neon sign had appeared from heaven and I was thankful, but bummed too.
Rewind a week and a half and you find me stressed. The Titanic kind of stress that shows a bit above the surface, but the massive mean part lurks just under the water's edge. The what ifs, the maybes and the life decisions that have Everest sized consequences are Thing 1, 2 and their younger brother 3 causing chaos and commotion in my brain. Sleep...Ha! Who does that anymore? I certainly don't partake. But, that sleepless night a week and a half ago is when I told God that I was too weak to make this elephant sized decision. I would pursue this job until He opened or closed the door clearly. Well...the door closed.
Slammed in fact.
This is good to know. It is also good to know that God is working/not working things out and letting me know along the way. The main dish is gone, but there are a few peas and carrots left on my plate. Edible hope. Is an extra helping of patience included in this happy meal?
"I wish I had better news for you but that came down from the top. Anyway, I wish you the best of luck finding a great job and if there is anything I can do to help you with your search please let me know."
Kindest Regards, God
5 weeks ago